In Orca News

In the words of Calhoun Tubbs, “Wrote a song about it. Like to hear it? Hear it goes!” At exactly one, I am the world’s leading expert on Sea World Orca raps. No one has dedicated more of their life’s work to the rapping of Orca related topics than me. To the extent such dedication has been recognized by the academies of science, it has. I have been honored with every possible award and accolade ever given for the rapping of Orca songs. 100% of them. I am known, in Orca, as, “meeeeeaaaaawwwwwwwwwuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa the terrific.”

I finally saw Blackfish.

It largely substantiated the hype. In response to the damning documentary, Sea World has mounted a public relations campaign. I think the movie posed two main questions. First, a moral one. Is it right for us to keep a sophisticated mammal with epic scale emotional and environmental need in what amounts to a wash sink? Notwithstanding the cultural and scientific benefits, the answer seems pretty clearly “no.” The second question is a logistical one. To the extent they remain in captivity, is it permissible for trained handlers to swim with them? I think this question is a closer call than the movie implies. The real indictment of Sea World is a transparency one. Trainers were not given relevant information about the behavioral history of the animals. As a result, they likely were not able to make informed decisions about the attendant risk of their regular proximity to them, rightly justifying substantial bitterness. But, the movie represents an incident rate that suggests that the risk of attack might be an acceptable one so long as trainers are made fully aware and necessary precautions are taken to minimize impact to audiences.

The science is already in. How we treat animals says a lot about us. Apparently, we’re jerkfaces.


In other documentary news, my wife and I just saw A Band Called Death, about the rediscovery of an all-black seventies punk band from Detroit called “Totally Alive.” Just kidding. They were called Death.


A must see. And, it gives me hope that someone’s going to “coming looking” for my blong material one day too. Until then, more Orca raps all around.

Performed by theipoetlaureate. Music produced by djclutch.

Today’s blong here:

No Room

3 thoughts on “In Orca News

  1. I must admit that some of my favorite blongs of yours are the ones that aren’t necessarily about the largest story in the media but something that you stumbled on which perks a personal interest of yours. I think its one of the best qualities of any blogger, to find a unique and sometimes largely unnoticed thing to speak a bit upon. Thus was the case here, with this exquisite piece on the two documentaries and, to a degree, an aspect of humanity that some of us don’t ever consider to question. Kudos on that.

    The blong itself is beautiful, man. Something that floors me sometimes is just how poetically skillful your ability to tackle a concept can be. It trips me out, knowing that you knock these tunes out in a small time frame YET, don’t lose the quality that can be found on a full release like “Prince with a thousand Enemies.” Remind me to discuss with you some writing issues I’ve discovered my recent works to have. You may have an insight that will help me better approach some hurdles.

  2. Thanks all around, Conduct. I do sometimes feel pressure to treat “the story” in a way that I used to resist. Thanks for the encouragement in that respect and I’ll keep it mind. Glad you liked the song. Wasn’t sure how it would hit people. Always down to talk songwriting.

  3. Amazing, with the band death! who would have thought, dudes like that would be rocking in the 70s!! flabbergasted.

    Tragic news about the orca news! I heard what happen to that lady sometime back, however I did not know they made a movie about it!! Every since I got married, My wife has help me discover the heart I have for animals! She’s a paramedic and is crazy about animals! Rescued a few possums from the womb of a mother who was apparently dead for several hours. Good day. :)

    -jesus h

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