In the actual wake of Harvey’s devastation and Irma’s forthcoming, it’s simple and hard to help all at the same time. Never in human history has it been easier to give financially in support. You can literally text it. Houston Texans’ J.J. Watt has raised over $28 Million. Which also happens to be his PR in the clean and jerk. Of course, it’s always a little harder to be boots on the ground. Or, in this case, dingies in the river.

I can’t seem to do either.

And, in that sense I relate to Joel Osteen. Or at least the social media caricature of a man like Joel Osteen. Osteen is the pastor of the, ironically named, Lakewood Church, in Houston. He came under Twitter rage and other media scrutiny last week for failing to have his church open to shelter victims of Hurricane Harvey. A clear missed opportunity by someone to headline the story, “Floodgate,” in traditional scandal parlance.

Joel and I share a lot in common actually. 4:1 hairproduct-to-head ratio. An infinity smile. He probably has like 15 checkbooks; I can barely balance mine.

You have to be ready to be helpful. It’s not something you just become when help is needed. In attitude and priority, you have to prepare to be useful. Flexibility to respond. Assets to give. An attitude to serve.

People are at my door too. I just can’t ever seem to be ready. I get it, Joel. I really do.

Written and performed by sintax.the.terrific. Produced by Beatowski.

Today’s blong here:

The Book of Joel