.406

That’s what Ted Williams hit in 1941, the last time someone hit over .400 in Major League Baseball.  Ted Williams is also the name of the recently discovered homeless man with the golden radio voice, subsequently celebritized and made numerous job offers, including with the Cleveland Cavaliers.  Days into his foisted upon fame, he had an altercation with his family and voluntarily entered rehab for substance abuse.   Some would treat the events as a cautionary tale that charity seldom goes unpunished and that such opportunities are wasted upon vagrants.   But life, like baseball, is a game of failures.  A player that fails at the plate 70% of the time is an all-star.  If you fail 60%, you are immortalized, like Teddy Ballgame.  So when a man comes off the streets, and he has a little trouble, he should just get back up.  And, we should understand.

Thanks to the Twitter contest winners who provided inspiration for this Frankenstein monster of a song.

@paradoxhiphop – Ted Williams

@cj_appa – Jubilee Project

@stephenmaddox1 – Gardena High Shooting

@DwainlBe – Regis Philbin Retiring

@mikey_dooks – Woolly Mammoth cloning project

This cooperative concept is a work in progress.  I’ll get it figured out.  I think I might solicit actual lines next time.  Thanks for participating and for following.

Not as an excuse but just as a reminder, these songs are being produced under extraordinary time pressure and life constraints.  Where they are failing in substance, I hope they are succeeding in spirit.

Performed by ipoet.  Music produced by pumpkinFoot.

Today’s delayed-steal audio here:

Teddy Ballgame

5 thoughts on “.406

  1. Best comment on this event yet … I loved the guy since the first time I saw him and I hoped that the inevitable wouldn’t happen.

  2. Thanks man. We develop this weird hope and expectation in the youtube-slice of a man we see, forgetting the actual man that has to try and live out these kind of things in public view. But, I bet he wouldn’t trade rehab, attention, and a little public humiliation for the loneliness of the streets. He’s gotta wind up better for it even if he doesn’t get to announce Varejao’s return. Happy Birthday! I almost forgot!!

  3. On the Ted W. tip, I always feel it necessary to remind everyone that Ted Williams was the caliber of player in spite of serving 5 years as a Marine Corps Pilot in the service during WWII and the Korean War. Both times he did it on account of the draft but still… Can you imagine A-Rod leaving the Rangers in ’01 to fly attack helicopters in Afghanistan!?

  4. Yeah, it’s really unthinkable in today’s terms. But, in truth, our professional athletes probably represent one of the richest pools from which to draw our military personnel. We just don’t think in those terms anymore, not only because we don’t have universal conscription, but because they appear to exist so apart from the trappings of regular society.

  5. Pingback: ipoet laureate: a very unique blog « The Ekklesia in Southern Maine

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